The many Adventures of Neko and her Muses
by Elizabeth Valentine
Summary: Various adventures had by me and my muses around the world of Anime. Not completely Yu-gi-oh but...oh well
1. Neko and her muses kill Relena from Gund...

Disclaimer dude: Neko-chan and Sakura-chan do not own any characters mentioned in this fic. *is thwapped by Neko-chan, even though she knows it's true*  
  
Neko-chan: *Waves* Hiya all and welcome to the newest, er, first instalment of my latest line of ficcies!  
  
Kai: *sarcastically* Oh joy.  
  
Neko-chan: *ignores him* me and my muses are gonna have lotsa fun going around, killing and torturing annoying characters!  
  
Kai: *not sarcastically* Oh joy!  
  
Neko-chan: Let's introduce the team! Say hi guys!  
  
Rei: Who are you talking to?  
  
Neko-chan: SAY HI GUYS!  
  
Muses Rei, Malik, Bakura, Seto, Joey, Legolas, Zell, Seifer, Squall, Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Sanosuke, Kenshin, Ryo and Akira: *sweatdrop* er, hi.  
  
Neko-chan: KAI, YOU DIDN'T SAY HI! *thwaps him over the head with a giant fish*  
  
Kai: but they already know I'm here.  
  
Neko-chan: *thwaps him several more times with the oversized fish*  
  
Kai: @_@  
  
Neko-chan: much better. Now, are we ready to go kill some annoying characters?  
  
All: YEAH! (not even the characters like the annoying ones!)  
  
Neko-chan: Ok, where's the list?  
  
Malik: *hands Neko-chan a veeeeeeeeeeery long piece of paper*  
  
Neko-chan: Thankyouuuuuuuuuuu *glomps Malik*  
  
Malik: Ek!  
  
Neko-chan: *reads from the list* Ok, first annoying character to kill is...  
  
*drumroll*  
  
Neko-chan: RELENA FROM GUNDAM WING!  
  
All: boo! (everyone hates Relena!)  
  
Neko-chan: ok, does everyone have their weapons?  
  
All: *hold up various objects, including a flame-thrower, a large sword, a board with a nail stuck through it and a pointy stick*  
  
Neko-chan: THEN LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Malik: Wait!  
  
Neko-chan: WHAT?!?  
  
Malik: *hands Neko-chan a bag of sugar* You'll never survive the day without this! *smiles*  
  
Neko-chan: WHEE! SUGAR! *eats the whole bag in less than thirty seconds* THANKYOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *glomps Malik*  
  
Malik: *passes out* @_@  
  
Rei: that makes two...  
  
Seifer: anyone would think he was trying to suck up for some reason...  
  
Sanosuke: yup...  
  
Neko-chan: *thwaps them all with the fish*  
  
Rei: @_@  
  
Seifer: @_@  
  
Sanosuke: @_@  
  
Neko-chan: ok, let's go! *walks off with fish slung over one shoulder and Malik over the other*  
  
All: *follow obediently behind*  
  
Rei, Seifer and Sanosuke: *wake up* WAIT FOR US! *run to catch up*  
  
Kai: *follows* idiots  
  
Malik: *wakes up* PUT ME DOWN!  
  
Neko-chan: *drops Malik*  
  
Malik: ow!  
  
Neko-chan: *spots Relena in the distance flirting with Heero* THERE SHE IS, GET HER!  
  
All: GAH! *run after Relena*  
  
Relena: Help! Heero!  
  
Heero: *runs in the opposite direction*  
  
Neko-chan: MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! *thwaps Relena with her fish*  
  
Malik: *attacks her with his rod*  
  
Bakura: *pokes her with his pointy stick*  
  
All: *fall over laughing at Bakura*  
  
Bakura: *cries*  
  
Sakura-chan: *appears out of nowhere* DON'T MAKE FUN OF MY BAKURA! *thwaps them all with a veeeeeeeeeery long stick*  
  
Neko-chan: YEY! Sakura-chan, we're killing annoying characters, wanna join in??  
  
Sakura-chan: YEAH! *proceeds to kill Relena with her long stick, which is actually a magik staff*  
  
Neko-chan: *beats Relena to death with her fish*  
  
All: *cheer*  
  
Sakura-chan and Neko-chan: *beat Relena into a bloody pulp*  
  
All: *pick Sakura-chan and Neko-chan up and carry them off*  
  
Sakura-chan: Whee! Read and review!  
  
Neko-chan: Who shall we kill next?? You tell us! 


	2. Neko duels Yugi while Anzu watches and K...

A/N: hi hi hi. Ok, this is weird, even by my usual standards.  
  
One day, me and my muses decided to go visit Yugi and co. to challenge him to a duel.  
  
Neko: ok shrimp, put 'em up!  
  
Yugi: *looks confused and twatish* huh? Wha..?  
  
Neko: duel me!  
  
Yugi: ok, I can do that! Um, where can we duel?  
  
Neko: *rolls eyes* you know, you don't seem nearly as dumb on TV. We'll go duel at Kaiba Land.  
  
Yugi: Can we do that?  
  
Neko: yes.  
  
All muses: *cheer*  
  
Neko: I'm not in the mood. *shoves them all in a little box, Yugi included*  
  
Yugi: *muffled* hey, who put the tights out?  
  
Anzu: That's lights, not tights Yugi.  
  
Neko: oops, sorry shrimp. *lets him out* ok, let's gooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!  
  
Yugi: ??  
  
Neko: follow me! *marches off in some random direction and somehow ends up at Kaiba Land.*  
  
Anzu: huh? How did that happen, we didn't even move?  
  
Neko: AUTHORESS POWER!!  
  
Anzu: I wont ask.  
  
Kaiba: *appears out of nowhere* Do you want to use one of the arenas?  
  
Neko: SETO-KUN!!! *glomps the surprised billionaire*  
  
Yugi: yes please! *puppy dog eyes at Seto*  
  
Anzu: where did you come from?  
  
Neko & Kaiba: AUTHORESS POWER!!  
  
Anzu: O.o Kaiba's a girl?!?  
  
Yugi: No.  
  
Neko: And how would you know, hmmm? *evil glance*  
  
Yugi: *Blushes*  
  
Kaiba: *ignores them* no you cant use one of my arenas because I'm an evil sadistic bastard, MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!  
  
Neko: *thwacks him unconscious* YOU'RE NOT KAIBA!!  
  
Yugi: *cries*  
  
Neko: Let's go! *they magikally appear at an arena*  
  
Yugi: YU-GI-OH!  
  
Neko: oh shut up.  
  
Yami: MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!  
  
Neko: O.o  
  
Anzu: O.o  
  
Yami: ah, much better.  
  
Neko: DON'T PEE IN THE ARENA!  
  
Yami: Sorry. Let's duel.  
  
*the duel begins*  
  
Neko: I play a card in defence mode and end my turn  
  
Yami: I play the Dark Magician in attack mode and attack your defence monster.  
  
Dark Magician: EWWW, WHO PEED IN THE ARENA?!? *wont move*  
  
Neko: MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! I WIN BY DEFAULT!!!  
  
Yami: No you don't.  
  
Neko: oh, ok then. I play the Blue Eyes White Dragon!  
  
Yami: How'd you get that??  
  
Neko: borrowed it off Kaiba.  
  
Yami: oh, ok.  
  
Neko: now I attack your Dark Magician with Blue Eyes, then I switch Judge Man into attack mode and attack your life points directly.  
  
Yami: NOOOOOOOOOOOO, I LOST TO A GIRL!  
  
Neko & Anzu: HEY! *kill Yami and Yugi*  
  
All muses in box: *muffled cheer*  
  
Neko: hmmm, something still isn't right *kills Anzu* ahhhh, much better.  
  
All muses in box: ahhhh, Bisto!  
  
Neko: I WON I WON I WON!!!  
  
And they all died happily ever after.  
  
The End. 


	3. COMPETITION AND DUELING!

DON'T OWN, DON'T SUE. READ THIS, THERE IS A COMPETITION @ THE END!!!  
  
(In Yu-Gi-Oh Land)  
  
Yugi and Jou are duelling outside while everyone else watches  
  
Yugi: ...and I attack with Dark Magician, bringing your life-points down to zero. I win!  
  
Jou: How in fucks name did you do that?!?  
  
Neko (in a tree): Such language!  
  
Mai: Who are you?  
  
Neko: I am Neko, the Slash Queen and ruler of the shounen-ai megaverse! *kills Mai*  
  
No one cares that Mai is dead  
  
Seto: Get down before you fall down.  
  
Neko: I won't fall down *falls down*  
  
Seto -_-* told you.  
  
Neko: ...shut up.  
  
Seto: Why should I?!?  
  
Neko: because you will be punished *uses Millennium Slash Rod to make Seto make out with Jou. Jou isn't complaining*  
  
Mai (from the dead): Hey! that's my boyfriend!  
  
Neko: Sorry, sweetie. Jou's gay.  
  
Mai: ...Oh. Ok, Anzu, will you go out with me?  
  
Anzu: ok ^__^  
  
Mai: ^__^  
  
Neko: *ahem* I'm the slash queen, NOT the fem-slash queen! *thwaps Kasu and Tom the Elf Killer for having dirty thoughts*  
  
TtEK: O.o when did we get here?  
  
Neko: go home.  
  
Tom the Elf Killer and Kasu go home  
  
Neko: ANYWAY, I am here to make the wonderful reviewers in ff.net land happy, so you will all make out with each other...NOW!  
  
Malik/Bakura, Yami Malik/Yami Bakura, Jou/Seto and Yami/Yugi occurs  
  
Honda: *picking his nose* My name is Tristan. *looks stupid*  
  
Neko: YEY! ^______^  
  
Otogi: *appears out of nowhere* What's going on??  
  
Neko: DUKIE!!!  
  
Otogi: uh-oh! *sees the mass make out session* ooooooooh! *joins in*  
  
Weird threesome between Seto/Ryouji/Jou  
  
Neko: ME HAPPY!!!  
  
Readers: *nosebleed*  
  
Neko: OK, HERE'S THE DEAL WITH THIS CHAPTER: I'm going to write a yaoi fic. However, I am not sure what about yet so I'm gonna let one of you guys choose. Any combination of the following:  
  
Malik, Yami Malik, Bakura, Yami Bakura, Jou, Seto, Ryouji, Yugi, Yami Yugi.  
  
I write pairings and threesomes and it can be any genre, but I'm better at angst and romance.  
  
NOW, what do you have to do to win this once in a lifetime opportunity? Merely answer the following random questions of course! The one with the most correct answers wins! Feel free to leave plot bunnies too.  
  
Who is Ryo Asuka?  
  
What is Hyperion?  
  
Who plays Legolas in LOTR?  
  
Where did Sanosuke get his last name?  
  
Which anime series do Fuuma, Nataku and Kamui come from? (easy question)  
  
What does 1x2 refer to? (these just get easier and easier)  
  
Which band does Sakuma Ryuichi sing with?  
  
In ancient Egyptian hieroglyphs, what do the symbols 'hill slope, vulture, loaf, twisted flax, mouth, two reed leaves, water' roughly spell? (hint: It's my real name)  
  
Name the Jackal-headed guardian of the dead.  
  
Name three of the pilots from Gundam Wing. 


End file.
